I’ll try being nicer if you try being smarter!

Universal Truth #83

Continuing on with my Universal Truth’s  — the things everyone thinks and knows, and are kind of unwritten social standards, but not many people will say. By the way, if you get offended on other’s behalfs (behalves?) easily, perhaps you should consider moving on to another page. Cuz I don’t want to deal with your hate mail. You have been told.

Here it is: If you have man boobies, the world cannot take you seriously. This is a Universal Truth.

Peronally, all I can think about is possible ways for you to cover them up, so as not to assault my senses. I’m fairly sure I’m not alone in this feeling. Look, I understand it’s hard not to be fat, I get that. But I also understand that there are techniques that one can employ so as not to look as fat as they are. In the case of man boobies, they might be: not wearing that button down, thin material shirt; not wearing that clingy t-shirt; strapping the suckers down with duct tape or a bro (did that ever go into production?); constantly holding something in front of you.

It occured to me the other day in the elevator, while I was listening to a conversation between three businessmen. All were dressed fairly respectably. They were having a fairly normal conversation about business. But I realized, as I looked at the one with moobs (man boobs), I just couldn’t take him seriously. He seemed to me unable to be as intelligent as his colleagues. I’m sorry. It’s a character flaw of mine. I might work on it one day. Until then, please:

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Comments on: "Universal Truth #83" (2)

  1. I am so with you on this one. I don’t mean to be, I really don’t because I also know that it’s hard not to be fat, but seriously, I don’t want to stare at them and yet there is nothing I can do to make my eyes look away. Nothing. I’ve tried!

  2. I’m just sayin’……nobody likes things flopping around. I contain mine, I’m just asking for the same courtesy.

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