I’ll try being nicer if you try being smarter!

I picked up the mail today, as I do every day. But today there was a little thing from Second Cup.

I heart Second Cup. But it makes me fat, so I’m only allowed to go on Saturdays and buy myself a delicious, delicious white mocha, or a hazelnut latte sprinkled liberally with cinnamon. Hold on, give me a moment…….okay, I’m back.

I did a little happy dance and opened it up. To my pure and uninhibited joy there was a Second Cup Cafe Card. This card has promised to have at least $2 on it, and could possibly have $30 on it! Good toward any gluttonous purchase I choose to make!

It's kind of like the batman symbol to me. I run to it.

Omigod, omigod, omigod!!

I danced my way to the elevator, and on my way up to my apartment, I had a BRILLIANT idea. I went back down to the mail area. There’s a huge container there where people throw away unwanted flyers and junk mail. This evening, I referred to this bin as the happiest place on earth.

I dove in. I frantically tossed aside Dominion grocery flyers and stupid Canadian Tire ads. I rifled and dug and excavated SIX other cards! Yes! So I now have $12 guaranteed off at Second Cup. Be still, my beating heart. Soon, you shall beat quicker with the aid of espresso shots.

Amen, sister.

It was pretty sad I think, looking back. I was all dressed ‘executive/corporate style’ complete with heels and sassy bag, and I was rooting through a bin, frantically trying to find 2 free dollars for coffee. Thank god nobody saw me.

Honestly? I might go back later tonight, after everyones had a chance to pick up their mail after work. Does that make me a cheapass? Or a caffeine slut? I’m not sure.

My life……she’s a sad one.

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Comments on: "Does this make me a cheapass? Or a caffeine slut?" (11)

  1. hahaha! I would do the same thing. I’m not a coffee fan, but free is free. Its not like i’d ever see the people again if they saw me going through it. You aren’t cheap. you are smart.

    I would see them again though, it’s not a huge building. I’d get a reputation as being the angry, desperate girl. Which I don’t need. But I’m gonna laugh all the way to the bank on this one…..

  2. OMG…that picture is perfect for the post!
    I have to honestly admit I’ve done this before over lesser coupons…I’m cheap!

    I’m just looking out for my bottom line!!

  3. Wait a minute… you were dressed “only in heels and a sassy bag”? That’s my kinda corporate, how come none of the girls in my office dress like that?

    No, no Paul. You seem to have a case of ‘male-readeritis’. You read what you wanted to read. And I don’t blame you, I’m fantastic so go ahead and dream. However, I said, ‘COMPLETE with heels and sassy bag’, as in the entire outfit was topped off with these accessories.

  4. Ha ha! Love that picture to illustrate your point. I think, in light of your last blog, you should hang out in that alley behind your house and walk around asking people (who are on their way to the gym): Hey, do you have some Cafe Cup Cards I can have?

    And then berate them for not apologizing when they say no. Fuck, didn’t their mom teach them manners? Pigs.

  5. I don’t “drink the coffee” as my late grandmother would say, but sometimes–in this fiscally challenged world in which we live, you go with whatchu got. And if you were bestiowed the unexpected bonus of a nifty gifty from the Gods of Free Shit
    (think one is named Morty by they way), then by all means…indulge.

    I was a virgin to your blog. I appreciate your writing. Like some adipose ridden swallow with a time share at Capistrano, I will be back.

    Laurie Kendrick
    Houston, TX USA

    I don’t know what adipose means, but I like you because you like me. You’re welcome any time. And I should start praying to Morty….I didn’t know he was around ’til now!

  6. so you never really mentioned how much money in gift cards you ended up getting.

    Patience my cranky counterpart! I have to go in and get the total of each one seperately, or they’ll catch onto my scam. Unfortunately, I missed Saturday Second Cup day cuz I was out of town. I will update you, don’t fret.

  7. Excellent. You’re cheap and you love you some yummy Second Cupness. Nothing wrong with that. What concerns me is why I haven’t gotten one. I did get a free box of cereal, but it wasn’t really great cereal…

    It’s because you live north of St. Clair. You lose out. Hehe.

  8. greenmetropolis said:

    I would totally do this if anything of the sort ever came by. Because there’s only four apartments in my building, and we all just have mail ‘slots’ which means I could outright steal any coupons that came in. I am not above doing this, especially to my downstairs neighbour and her 6:30 am jazz radio. However, nothing interesting has come in yet. Unless….gasp! Thieves!!!!!!!!!

    Haha, you have another Talea living in your building. Some poor cheap soul who can’t help but steal what is rightfully yours. That’s okay, you don’t love Second Cup the way I do anyways.

  9. I think you were totally justified in going into the bin. one girls trash is another girls treasure. I hope you went back in later too.

    I think it makes you both a cheapass and a caffiene slut. and it makes me your fucking number one fan. seriously.

    Why thank you! And I totally went back in later, but I could only unearth one. Alas, I got more than my fair share!

  10. Aint no shame in a little dumpster diving. I’ve gotten lots of cool shit from out of the trash. You wouldn’t believe what some people throw away. So I guess my answer is caffeine slut. Although slut sounds pretty harsh. Maybe like a caffeine escort.

  11. hahahah! Brillliant my lovely!
    I’d do the same damn thing.

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