I’ll try being nicer if you try being smarter!

Showering.

I fucking hate it.

I can’t stand it. It is seriously a huge issue every day when it comes time to shower. I dread it. It ruins my day, just like gym class used to in school. I think about it all day, then I groan and complain and cry when it actually has to happen.

I cannot stand having wet hair. Unfortunately this is rather unavoidable when one showers. And my hair stays wet forEVER, cuz it’s so damned long. And I refuse to blow-dry it, cuz another thing I hate is the feeling of wet hair. Yech.

I hate getting into the shower. You are cold and being pelted with water. Boy, what fun. I hate getting suds in my eyes. I hate shaving my legs. I hate when you turn the shower off and open the curtain and are hit with a huge wall of freezing cold air. I hate the feeling of the shower curtain. I hate how sticky and heavy the air gets and I can’t breathe in it. I hate the slippery shower floor.

I hate towelling off, cuz then towel lint gets everywhere and you have to clean the bathroom. I hate standing on a bath mat, it gets so gross. I hate NOT standing on the bathmat, cuz then I feel like I’m going to slip and die.

I hate putting pyjamas on after I shower. Cuz no matter what, you can never get completely dry, so they stick to you. I hate that. I hate the sound of the bathroom fan, but you have to leave it on after you shower, or else you’ll get mold and that’s just not right.

Whenever I have to shower, I feel like this:

It’s tough being a shower hater. It’s stressful. All I can hope for is that one day they actually invent that shower/dryer thing from the opening scene in the Jetsons. Then I’ll be one happy girl. Until then, maybe I’ll just shave my head.

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Comments on: "That’s right, I’m anti-shower." (12)

  1. i love that pic! how cute! don’t shave your head, you’ll like that even less than showering. then you’ll be forced to wear cheaply made wigs and people will start calling you “britney”. it’s not looking good.

    Ah joebec, thank you for being a voice of reason! I totally didn’t even think that people would call me Britney. Shit, maybe I’ll just go for dreadlocks then. You don’t have to wash those much, do you? But then people will call me a hippie…and I think I’d prefer Brit. Ugh. Normal hair it is.

  2. I love the shower. but I don’t like it if there is no hot water.. which gives me another topic for my blog…

    Most guys I know do love the shower. I will not go into that. But no hot water is definitely the worst. It makes your whole day suck.

  3. I hear you on the showering thing. For some reason, I don’t look forward to them either, and it’s largely because of my hair. Mine’s kind of long and thick, and it takes forever to dry (even on its own). But I take things one step further because my hair prevents me from working out – seriously. Because if I work out, then I know I just have to wash my hair, i.e. shower, and then it’s just so much work to prettify myself.

    Precisely! But somehow, not liking the shower isn’t a good enough reason to be fat and greasy. Go figure…..huh….

  4. I dread the shower too! I dread washing my hair – lather, rinse, condition, rinse. I hate that it has to happend every freaking day. I hate the pajama sticking thing too.

    I resent the fact that my body cannot be self-cleaning, like an oven.

    Amen! I love that you used the verb ‘dread’. I mean, you’re not fooling around when you use a word like dread. This shit is serious. And I’m so glad there’s other shower haters out there. I thought I was a freak. I wish my hair was self cleaning, that’s for sure.

  5. Hey, can I blogroll you? Me really really wants to do that.

    Yes! Please do! As you may have read (since I mention it daily), I am a stats whore. Blogroll me up!

  6. I agree, showering is a terrible exercise. I recently hired a zookeeper to hose me down once a week in my backyard (yeah, once a week); I still have to deal with the damp towels and pajamas sticking to me (yuck), but at least it’s a quicker process…

    Though I salute you for taking matters into your own hands, you are going to want to rethink that plan once winter arrives here in Toronto Romi, which should be any minute now. Then you’re going to have ice to deal with. I’m just looking out for you pal.

  7. I love standing in the shower, but I am definitely with you on the wet hair thing. I have long hair as well and I hate it when it’s wet. Such a bugger to dry off, and it means your top gets a long wet patch down the back. Baaah.

    The wet back thing is indeed a very crappy thing to deal with. And no way around it really.

  8. Have you even had your hair braided? the tiny on your head braids – I’m so out of it, I can’t remember the term for ’em… But I LOVED it when I had it done in Mexico – I didn’t have to wash my hair and dry it for weeks! ( I washed my head) it was FREEING! really! Of course it took HOURS to braid… worth it. THAT and all my coworkers hated it. Loved it!

    Um……no. Thank you for visiting me! But just……..no. Ever see that episode of friends where Monica got braids and looked like a total fucktard? Yeahhhh…..no.

  9. greenmetropolis said:

    I love my shower, but for reasons we won’t go into.

  10. greenmetropolis said:

    I love my shower, but for reasons we won’t go into.

  11. sexualtrex said:

    I thought I was weird because I hate it. Nothing good gets done when you’re in the shower. You can’t watch tv or eat. What’s the point?

  12. jennifer said:

    i did a google search on i hate showering and this post came up. my sentiments exactly. it’s 3 in the afternoon and i’ve been putting it off all day.
    but i’m just gonna have to do it i have big plans tonight and need to look good

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