This is the kind of family half of my genes come from.
My grandma called me tonight just to make sure I hadn’t gone up in flames with the huge explosion in Toronto this weekend. I’m too lazy to link to it, a big propane storage facility exploded overnight on Saturday I think.
So after I confirmed that I was not a charred pile of ashes, she started talking about what’s going on with her.
She tells me that she shaved her cat, cuz it was too matted to comb out.
In the background, I hear my uncle scream: “Shaved pussy!!!”
And my grandma goes, “Did you hear that Toady (I dont know, she calls us all Toady)? Shaved PUSSY! AAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHA!”
Me: “Yes Grandma. I heard it. Oh my god.”
The woman is in her 70’s and has 7 kids and 11 grandchildren and still cracks pussy jokes. She also taught us all to say shithead when we were little and encouraged us to torment each other. Her and my grandpa still flirt with each other and call each other idiots. It’s hilarious. My dad says he doesn’t ever remember them fighting with each other.
So they might be a bit…off colour, but they’re something to model myself after as well.
Just not the lame jokes part.